23

When angry, don’t try to vent by smashing things, punching a bag, or going for a run — first calm your body down

UpdatedGrade AMedium benefitTimeFreeLittle timeSome willpower

Punching a bag, cycling, or going for a run — ways of venting that amp the body up — generally do not cool anger. Slow breathing, mindfulness, and meditation — ways that settle the body — clearly cut anger and the urge to strike.

Cost
No cost at all. When you’re angry, try a few minutes of activities that slow your heart rate: breathe slowly, sit down, and quiet your mind. It’s hard to resist the urge to vent right then and there.
Benefit
A meta-analysis of 154 studies involving 184 sample groups and 10,189 participants shows that calming techniques like deep breathing, mindfulness, and meditation lower both anger and aggression. The effect size was g = -0.63, with a 95% CI ranging from -0.82 to -0.43. This result held true across genders, races, ages, and cultures. In contrast, activities that increase physical arousal — such as punching a bag, jogging, or cycling — showed virtually no effect; their effect size was g = -0.02, with a 95% CI from -0.13 to 0.09. The authors conclude that neither venting anger nor going for a run is an effective way to defuse it.
Notes
These findings measure anger and aggression, not overall energy levels. The authors categorize the time spent on calming activities as “minutes saved from dealing with fallout after an argument.” Immediate techniques you can use right now include the “circular sighing” method described in Section 22, Item 9, and “stepping away when angry” in Section 24, Item 18. Running isn’t useless in the long run — it helps ease low mood, as noted in Section 22, Item 7 (“When feeling down, go for a walk or run”). It simply isn’t a good short-term fix for anger. While angry, avoid driving, sending messages, or making important decisions. If someone is physically attacking you, leave the scene and call the police; your priority then is safety, not emotional regulation — see Section 8, Item 43 (“If you’re being abused”).
Sources · 1
  1. Kjærvik SL, Bushman BJ (2024). A meta-analytic review of anger management activities that increase or decrease arousal: What fuels or douses rage? Clinical Psychology Review. doi.org/10.1016/j.cpr.2024.102414

← Read the whole chapter: 3. Don’t waste energy

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